What I Want
by SirKriS
Summary: It finally happened. Molly's fed up with Sherlock ruining her dates and puts her foot down about it. But what she asks of the consulting detective isn't quite what anyone expected.
1. No More

**A/N: This plot bunny bit me while I was editing some of my WIPS. No clue if it will interest anyone though.**

* * *

"Sherlock you have no right to have my dates arrested like that!"

"If I may point out I had the Yard do the actual arresting. I just did my civil duty directing them to a wanted fugitive."

"No." Molly shook her head vehemently. "Don't use that logic to guilt-trip me. You know what I'm upset about."

"I'm sorry Molly, you might have to enlighten me. Or have you changed your criteria to accommodate terrorists into your ever-appalling taste in men?"

John leaned against the closet, arms folded as he watched them argue back and forth like a tennis ball match. Count on Sherlock to shamelessly visit Molly after sending an entire firearms unit to break a dinner date. In all honesty the outburst had been long overdue; it's just that John didn't know if he would be fortunate enough to witness it.

After the whole fake Moriarty business had been sorted out and all conversations of exile had been permanently discontinued, Sherlock had settled back into the terrible habit of cutting down Molly's love interests. Tom must have been a glitch in the system for he never held back his deductions. From closeted fetishes to just plain bad life decisions, Sherlock revealed anything everything that could put Molly off from dating them. When that didn't work, he did some impressive digging to uncover details that even the great Sherlock Holmes could not have figured out by the naked eye alone. Take Henry, the poor sod they were currently going on about.

"John! Tell Sherlock what I'm trying to say. I'm too angry to articulate."

"Um." He faltered, not expecting to be dragged into the argument. "I think she means she doesn't appreciate how you go out of your way to spoil her dates."

Sherlock, who had clearly been expecting John to take his side turned to face him with a look of utter betrayal.

"Are you telling me I should have let her date him?"

"No, I mean." John scratched his nose nervously. Shit, this was not a great situation to be in. "It's becoming a trend you know. Finding every possible fault in all the guys that ask her out. "Like this thing about Henry. You went through a lot of trouble just to find out about him funding a terrorist cell 10 years ago. He's done nothing wrong since then."

"Past actions are best predictors of future behavior." He explained bluntly.

Molly threw her hands up in exasperation.

"Okay," John unfolded his arms. He was suddenly getting defensive about defending Molly's point. "Henry's an extreme example. Take the past…" He mentally began tallying love interests he had thwarted.

"Nine." Molly provided.

"Yes! Nine. Wow really?" He asked Molly who fumed at him. "Right sorry. Anyway, you've butted into every date or potential date she's had, going even as far as to intimidate some because you said they were stupid."

"Which they were."

"No that's not—" He groaned. Sherlock was being difficult on purpose. He had to be. No one was this dense. "You're being a bit of a—"

"A fucking cockblocker!"

All eyes whirled to the pathologist. John gaped at her. He had never her swear before. The same could be said for Sherlock who looked equally scandalised.

"There I said it." She glared, eyes daring the consulting detective to say otherwise.

A pregnant pause couldn't be appropriately said to describe the silence that followed. Good lord, triplets could have been born in the span it took for Sherlock to reply; but reply he did.

"Given how determined you are to secure a life partner, and your extremely poor record of finding one, I only thought it considerate as your _friend_ to point out undesirable traits in your candidates before you earned more heartache."

"By screening anyone with a penis that's remotely interested in me?"

Sherlock narrowed his eyes at her. "If need be."

"Fine." Molly narrowed her eyes in turn, seemingly to have come to a decision. "If you're going to be so helpful then you might as well do all the work."

* * *

"John you can't just stop there!"

Mary hands hovered Elizabeth's form. She had just finished strapping on the diaper when her husband stopped the tale; at the best part no less! As if they were conspiring against her, Elizabeth cooed delightfully over her father's silent quakes of laughter. "What happened?"

"Sorry, it's just his face," he breathed out between the laughs. "It was like he malfunctioned or something."

"John I swear if you don't—"

"Okay, okay." He blew out a breath. "So we both thought, or at least _I_ thought she meant he should date her instead."

"She didn't?" she asked, confused.

"Nope." He grinned widely. "Molly asked Sherlock Holmes to find her a boyfriend."

* * *

**A/N: To be continued…?**


	2. They're Serious

**A/N: Woah I didn't think the story would peak ppl's interests! Thank you for writing the reviews. I love reading them! Okay so, I've plotted quite a few chapters for but as usual, I'm worried about mucking the story up and so I won't post everything at once.**

***deep breaths* Here goes.  
**

* * *

"Dhon—" Sherlock cleared his throat. "Don't be ridiculous Molly."

John turned curiously to look at the consulting detective. Only once had he heard slur or stutter in front of a woman, and she had been naked.

Molly, on the other hand, was not impressed if at all fazed by his blunder. "Why? I mean you're halfway there, deducing the bad. Or is that all you can find in people?"

Sherlock pursed his lips to a thin line. He looked as if he was going to rebuttal, but his eyes settled on just deducing her. What he saw made him balk and it was all John could do not to laugh. "You're serious. You actually want me to find you a boyfriend."

His statement was met with raised eyebrows from the pathologist; not of surprise, but jest, as if daring him interpret her any less clearly. Sherlock then turned to John with an incredulous look, as if he needed verification that this was actually happened. John refused to provide any social cues on what should happen next. He was taking a backseat for this one.

They all stood in some ridiculous form of animation as they waited for someone to crack. It felt like minutes, but it must have honestly been a few seconds for someone did crack.

"Marriage-material or occasional bed-warmer?"

John choked back a gasp. Even Molly appeared to be thrown off by his words. He was going to do it? Sherlock must have garnered confidence from their stunned faces for his stood up a little straighter, his signature smirk donning his smug face.

"You're serious." Molly stated.

It was Sherlock's turn to raise his eyebrows in mock expectation. Molly only hesitated a beat before making her choice.

"Marriage material then."

John noticed Sherlock's slump slightly. But he could gather no insight from it for Sherlock was back to his cryptic self.

"If we have that settled. Can we now we _please_ look at Tim Knightley's toxic reports? We still have a crazed pharmacist to catch."

* * *

The more John looked back, the funnier it all seemed to be, especially the stupefied look Sherlock got. That was gold, he repeated many times during his retelling. Had Molly not blindsided them and gone a different route he would have kept the mental note to bring up that face during his best man speech for their wedding.

"It's not too late for that."Mary said as balanced Elizabeth on on her waist. They had taken the conversation to the kitchen where she could prepare a bottle.

"Yeah but,"John started as he munched on an apple. His arm still tingled from where Mary smacked him minutes ago. Apparently waiting eight hours to relay this development was far too long."I know you think he fancies her and all…"

"John." She gave him a pointed look.

"Okay, _we_ think he fancies her but this is Sherlock Holmes. He's not the most conventional bloke."

"He's your best friend isn't he?"

"What does that have to do with anything? He's Sherlock _bloody_ Holmes."

Mary rolled her eyes. "You're the one who said his interferences were getting out of hand. And we both know Sherlock doesn't waste energy on things he doesn't care about."

John hummed noncommittally as he took another bite. That was true, at least concerning that Henry character. John didn't know how but he even got the armed unit to make the arrest, and the man hadn't even been armed! Poor sod.

"_No._" Mary's soft voice cut through his thoughts. She was gently prying a measuring cup away from her fingers. "That is _not_ edible, Lizzie love."

John smiled warmly at the scene. He had come a long way since meeting Sherlock Holmes. The roller-coaster that had always been his life never hinted it would lead him to all this; domestic bliss, as Sherlock would say in a contemptuous voice. If there's anything he's learned in the past few years, it was that things were never really as they seemed. Maybe Mary was right. Maybe there was more to the odd turn of events.

"Then why did he agree?" John asked, going to the plight his best friend had set on himself. After the toxic reports he had promptly left the lab, never returning to Barts for the rest of the day. Any attempts made to broach the subject had been deflected, not that there was much time once he got a fresh trail on the killer.

"Because he's a hopeless idiot?" Mary offered.

"Hm." He took another bite out of his apple. The great Sherlock Holmes, a hopeless idiot. Somehow that wasn't very far fetched.

* * *

**A/N: Are we still there?**


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